We have a loving family and give our children whatever they need. Overall, I believe our daughter demonstrates good judgment and don't understand why she would do such a thing. How do I approach her and get honest answers before she gets caught by the authorities? — Scared Mother in N.Y.

Dear Scared: Shoplifting isn't always about obtaining items you can't afford. It may be about the thrill, peer pressure, depression, stress, anger or a need for attention. Teenagers often don't realize how severe the penalties can be. If your daughter is caught shoplifting, she can be arrested, and if the store presses charges, she could end up with a criminal record that will affect the rest of her life.

You need to have a calm discussion with her and find out what's going on. You start by telling her you saw the expensive bracelet and earrings in her room and ask how she got them. If she doesn't supply a believable response, say that you are worried about shoplifting and explain the consequences. You should go with her to return stolen items to the store — although the store may still press charges. If she has difficulty stopping this behavior, please talk to your doctor about therapy.